#Strange Bird - #25

Little ghost, you're listening

Unlike most, you don't miss a thing.

You see the truth.

I walk the halls invisibly

I climb the walls, no one sees me.

No one but you.

You've always loved the strange birds

Now I want to fly into your world, I want to be heard.

My wounded wings still beating.

You've always loved the stranger, inside of me... ugly, pretty.

 ~ Birdy 

#Darkness - #24

~ {Darkness} ~

Who do you find in the {dark} recesses?  In the dark recesses of my mind and the dark recesses of my heart... the wounded self.

I know who I want to find there...  my authentic self... the same self as the one I am in the light for the world to see.

However, I'm not always proud of who I see there or know there.  I know it will be my forever true work in progress.  And I hope it will be a journey that one day I will have peace with. And be proud of.  The quintessence* of my true work and true self.

I know I can't do it alone.

*{the aspect of something regarded as the intrinsic and central constituent of it's character / the most perfect example of quality}

#Age - #23

the dark truth about {age}ing is that she comes for all of us.

And when she's ready, she's swift.

To claim our skin. our hair. and her ultimate prize... 

our youth.

It's what makes us all equal. the same.

Learning to embrace the new depth that she leaves me with.

And in that, finding it's own kind of beauty in my same but different face.

#Mirrors - #22

{true mirror}

I discovered Caroline McHugh's talk this week about "The Art of being Yourself".

She explains the phenomenon about a true {mirror}.... designed by John and Catherine Walters.

It was discovered that when 2 mirrors are put together at right angles to each other and the seam taken away, what you see is exactly what other people see when they look at you.

In other words when we look in a normal mirror - it's not a true reflection of you.

"when you look in a normal mirror, you look for the assurance that you are beautiful or young or tidy or that your bum isn't too big.  But when you look in a true {mirror} you don't look AT yourself, you look FOR yourself.  You look for revelation, not reassurance"...  powerful stuff!

I'm not going to write too much about what she says here - please watch this.

She's beautifully articulate and one of the most beautiful talks I've ever listened to.

I love what her key question is - 

"Who do you think you are?"

She challenges us not to ask "what's your life expectancy but what do you expect from life and what does life expect from you? 

This is definitely the theme of my life this year.  About living a resonate and authentic life!  About being ever present and seeing everything.  Never wasting.  

I love this so much - what does your true {mirror} say about you... phew!

#Found - #21

{Found}

#Wisdom - #20

"Knowing yourself  is the beginning of all wisdom."- Aristotle

#Dramatic - #19

"While many of the blocks to creativity are internal, one of the largest and most common blocks is not.  This external block is a destructive alliance that many creative people make with the type of personality that we call a "crazy-maker".  What is a "crazy-maker"?  Well the name tells all... a "crazy-maker" is someone who makes you crazy by constantly stirring up storms.  "Crazy-makers" are frequently charismatic, charming and likable people but for the creatives around them they can be poison.  Long on problems, short on solutions, "crazy-makers" drain your creative energy.  They always have a reason why something can't be done... "it's too late, it's not my job, they said they couldn't, let me finish this first or I forgot".  "Crazy-makers" make you feel {dramatic}.  You veer between wanting to kill them and wanting to kill yourself.  There is no right way to deal with a "crazy-maker" because the situation keeps changing.  "Crazy-makers" thrive on drama.  Everything is an emergency, a deadline, a matter of life and death or something they will get to eventually.  No doubt about it, for the creative wanting to stay blocked, linking forces with a "crazy-maker" is the ideal way to do it.  "Crazy-Makers" break deals and destroy schedules.  Their emergency always takes precedence.  "Crazy-Makers" expect special treatment, they suffer a wild and colorful variety of aliments.  "Crazy-Makers" discount your reality.  Your pressing agenda, however real is never ever as important as their own.  "Crazy-Makers" triangulate those they deal with always relaying what so-and-so said about us.  They are expert at gossip.  "Crazy-Makers" are also expert blamers.  Everything is always their problem but never their fault.  "Crazy-Makers" hate schedules, except their own.  It doesn't matter that everybody else has known about the deadline for weeks.  "Crazy-Makers" hate order, papers blanket their office and yours, if they can manage it.  "Crazy-Makers" deny that they are "crazy-makers".

The craziest thing about "crazy-makers" is that we are crazy enough to get involved with one.  If the thumbnail sketches above sounds familiar, admit that you have found a clever way to sabotage yourself.  Julia Cameron The Artists Way at Work - Riding the Dragon.

Wow - that's hardcore.

This post for me is dual reminder...

I don't think I'm a very dramatic person, I think on the most part I pretty even-keeled but this is a constant reminder not to be a {drama} queen, ever.  But more so for me to is how recognize and steer clear of the "crazy-making" people I seem to attract.  Almost 3 years ago, I made a conscious decision to eliminate this element in my life - just to keep the drama and {dramatic} situations on the down-low.  And I have to say I'm having a much more peaceful life.

Not sure why it took me so long to recognize the cycles and patterns but now when I see {drama} coming, I virtually run a mile.  I want to involve myself in things that really matter and really make sense.  And not let the {drama} clutter my soul!  My greatest aim now - is to help my girls not go down the route of being {drama} queens or "crazy-makers" and help them recognize crazy-makers and how to actively choose against it, at all costs!